First, where I’ve been
For those of you who’ve kept up with me for a while, this may be something that you just know. Because you’re smart as crap and ever-insightful. But I don’t think I’ve actually processed what happened this year. So I’m going to process it now.
The March rise to global domination (minus the evil cackling)
March changed everything. A switch went on and I discovered I am passionate about content-driven websites. Really, really passionate about changing the crap that doesn’t work on the internet. And I don’t mean stuff that doesn’t work technically. I mean stuff that doesn’t work in a bottom-line sort of way. Or in a relationship sort of way (because you know, both are tightly connected in this online space of ours).
So I put myself out there that way. And man, you could have sucker-punched me in the face and I would not have been more shocked at what came next. The consistent knocking-at-my-front-door started the moment that I decided what I stood for (and what I didn’t). Or more precisely, it started with the website re-design that came along with it. I stopped being just a web designer in that moment. I still hadn’t figured out what I was, but the freedom that brought about was intoxicating.
Discovering the complexities of YES!
All of these wonderful people knocking on my door, wanting to work with me…it was exhilarating. I took on way too much in March and April, and by the end of June a project that I never should have accepted was holding me underwater. I survived it. I had to scurry hard to regain my momentum, but I did it…with a lot of anxiety and a tad bit of vengeance.
(Your) road to rockstardom
Then finally, I found a way to describe the secret ingredient that makes me not (just) a web designer. I help people find their own rockstar qualities and show them how to rock it out online. In a quit-your-day-job kind of way. So I changed the blog to reflect that and gained a whole new set of ears in the process.
And now, where I’m going
I haven’t got this figured out, even the slightest. But this post is for processing. So let me compartmentalize it a bit (I am so Type A).
The blog
Ahh…blog. My chubby baby. I love you.
I’d like to post more often than twice a week. But I’d also like to keep everything here sacredly hawt. And I don’t think I can do both. So I’ve decided to break one of my own commandments and do some more frequent, less heady blogging in another space.
I’m not expecting anyone to read it, actually. It’s more so that I can keep the joy of blogging alive by giving homage to its more frivolous roots. (Remember when people blogged about their dog, their cornflakes, and their hideous boss? I kinda miss that.)
Still blogging here. Still twice a week. But I’m expecting this space to get even better as I stoke my inspiration fires by giving myself permission to be not awesome somewhere else. If that makes even the tiniest bit of sense to someone, please raise your hand. I feel better.
The under-the-sheet projects
Remember back in September when I went to Boulder to hang out with Gwen Bell and Liz Franco and had epiphanies and started secret projects that were covered with a sheet? Well, they’re still covered with a sheet. I’ve hemmed and hawed, gotten overwhelmed, gotten underwhelmed, and had both dreams and nightmares about them. They’re still there, but they’re being quiet. After I yelled at them to shut up. (Obedient little suckers.)
One of the weirdest things about what I do is that I help other people do stuff that I can’t quite help myself to do. (I secretly think that all of us have this problem. Or I hope. I hate being the sole weirdo in the room.) So my biggest goal for January is to decide what is going to launch next. Just decide. I give you permission to hold me accountable.
Client work
I am booked. BOOKED booked. And I actually hate to say that, because I don’t want this “you have to stand in line to work with me” thing to be a habit. In a lot of ways, it makes sense to hire people so that I can serve more of you. But talking with several highly-respected business owners who have been there, I’ve decided that I don’t want to be in management. I really like the work that I do now, and I don’t want to trade it for a full-time management position.
Another thing: I want to work on fewer projects at a time. I learned early on that I had to have a lot of projects to keep the bread and butter flowing. Projects get stalled all the time on the client end, and I have no end of compassion for the events that make that happen. So I’m kind of like an airline. I have to overbook to make sure that I’m covered. And I’ve gotten really, really good at all of the project juggling.
But that is stressful! Oh man, is that stressful. And I’m not a design cranker-outer by any means. It takes a lot of space and energy to do this job really well.
I haven’t settled on a pathway to making either of these changes a reality, but it’s going to be a big part of my decision-making process in the next couple of months. And I’m sure that’s a huge part of what has been keeping my under-the-sheet projects from being exposed to the world. Which is so not good, because they are yummy-hot-delicious.
So, thanks for processing with me
I’m mega-inspired by all of the 2010 goal-setting and general excitement going on. This flowy buzz around a communal topic is one of the reasons that I love the internet. (And by the way, my friend Aaron insists that it’s pronounced twenty-ten…not two thousand and ten. In case you were wondering.)
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